There has been something on my heart for a couple of weeks now, and I really feel like I am supposed to share this. I'm not sure why, but I guess someone out there needs to read this.
We hear so many people talk about testimonies, or they make a comment similar to "Oh, he/she has such a good testimony, have you heard it?" One day I started thinking about my own testimony. I have never had an Ah-ha moment when one minute I didn't believe and the next I did. I honestly have never asked God to come into my heart.
I started to get a little worried and wondered what that meant for me, and then it hit me. My testimony is of faithfulness. Not my faithfulness to God, but his to me. I have always known God. I did not have to ask God into my heart becuase like my parents, he has always been there. I do not remember a time of not knowing God. I was brought up in church and some of my earliest memories of childhood are of being in the Presbyterian Church in Washington, Pennsylvania. That is where I learned the Lord's Prayer. When we moved to Alabama my brother and I continued to be raised in church, and I have stayed very active in church my entire life. I, like every one else, have had ups and downs in my life, and through every single one, God was there. He has never left my side. He has been faithful to me since the moment I was born into this earthly world. Now, in all honesty there have been moments where I have felt him more, or I can look back and say, yes, he definitely had his hand in that situation, but even in the times when I didn't necessarily "feel" him, I knew he was there.
And now as I look at my children, I can see this same testimony in their lives. They have been in church from the moment they were conceived. I remember each one of them jumping in my belly as we sang songs in church, and they continue to be active in church today. And I know going to church does not make you a Christian and does not mean you have a relationship with God, but I see God working in their lives. I see them praying to God and it makes my heart glad. I know there may come a time when they may doubt, or wonder away from church or God, but I know God will continue to be faithful to them.
God has been faithful to us all, no matter how long you have known Him. "For surely I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord . . ." Jeremiah 29.11.
So if anyone else out there is wrestling with not having an "ah-ha" moment with God, that's okay. Your testimony is different, but just as good as everyone else's because it is yours, whatever it may be.